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    Facing Your Nightmares

    "I can taste the day,
    Savour night,
    Scream your dreams as you dare to fight!

    My eyes are filled with curiosity,
    You think that you have power over me!
    In this life, there's no room for you and me!
    So turn away or face this day with me!"

    - The chorus to "With Me" from Sonic and the Black Knight (yes, I know that game is trash)

    As I write this, I have begun undertaking something that I should have done long ago. For the past 8 or so months, I have been plagued by a nightmare. A nightmare of my own past and of my own inner fears. That, with time, I would succumb to a beast that is my own self.

    To those of you who do not understand, there's a big reason as to why I do not discuss my past. My life prior to high school or college. Or rather, a life that is no longer mine. Yet, despite how simple and unthreatening as it may be, it continues to haunt me. And it recently took form.
    I will spare most of you the details but know that, through a series of events, I begun having nightmares and greatly fearing a particular creature and the symbol that it may bear. To put it simply, I perceived the beast to be a nightmare I had been escaping my whole life. A broken and twisted creature of hatred and of a broken spirit. A creature that I wished not to become.

    Months and months on end, its name and figure kept lurking in my mind. Teasing me, haunting me, playing with me. If I didn't do something, there would likely be a chance that I would succumb to it or I would even break under its foreboding might. So I fled from it. I tried my hardest to blot it out or flee from it. But no matter what, the creature continued its haunt. How can one run away from something that is deeply rooted in your mind? To put it simply, you cannot. No matter how hard you may try, one cannot simply forget these things.

    This month, I decided enough was enough. Now on anti-depressants and fighting to overcome my mental issues, I decided to strike back at the one thing that has been haunting me. It was time to finally put an end to the madness. I needed to confront this beast. And that is what I have begun doing.
    If I seem shaken or possibly brimming with vigour, you'll likely know why.

    To those of reading, I must ask something of you. Is there something that you greatly fear? Is it possible that you too are running away from something that you feared?
    Please. Don't try to run away. Be strong and try to fight it. Confront it. Get up in its face and show that you are not afraid of it anymore, that you will not stand for it. It doesn't matter what it may be. Just know that you'll likely feel a lot better knowing that you've overcome your nightmares rather than just fleeing from them. Trust me, they're not as bad as they seem.
    Last edited by Luna Pixu; 07-03-2016, 12:43 PM.
    Smash through the blocks that bar your way; No time for fear, just let it all fall away; Nobody believes in me and you, Just look at the way they stare; So what if we live in a walled garden, As long as I've got you then I don't care!

    My 3DS Friend Code: 2208-5334-3531 (Ask for Pokémon shenanigans or random multiplayer games)
    My Switch Friend Code: SW-1503-3394-5328
    My NNID: OfficialTRXD
    Steam: http://steamcommunity.com/id/lunapixu/

    #2
    I legitimately fear that I'll end up being all alone physically and emotionally in life. Something that I actually dread and have had a few nightmares over the years that are too vague, but I remember enough to make myself feel bad whenever I remember them.

    Other than that I legitimately fear heights and a bit of a fear of losing.

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      #3
      When I'm not busy with anything, my mind often terrifies me... Most often it's just me thinking of how futile my life will end up, not having meant anything.
      It's not so much a fear, but it's still frightening how dark your own mind can get sometimes. It's the main reason I almost always listen to music, because no matter how dark the music may get, the mind can just get darker and darker.

      Also, I hope you'll be able to overcome your past/nightmares, TR. If there's anything I can do to help, or any of us, just know you only have to ask. ;P
      Originally posted by Mogeko
      Yummy prosciutto! Praise be to prosciutto!
      Originally posted by Lord Prosciutto
      Praise be to prosciutto.
      ..... I forgive the sin of all Mogeko.
      Release the Yukkuri:

      Comment


        #4
        @Leon
        Thank you. While it's not necessarily the past that I fear or wish to escape, I do wish to rise above what has come before. Of course, my mind is a very fickle thing. It knows just the right things to bog me down or terrify me. And to me enough was enough.
        I know not how long this may take but I do know that I've already made a great effort today. Though the nightmare itself may not be gone, I'm certain the form it took will no longer be a problem.

        That said, I don't know what to really ask of people in this. I'll likely think of something but I'm not sure.
        Smash through the blocks that bar your way; No time for fear, just let it all fall away; Nobody believes in me and you, Just look at the way they stare; So what if we live in a walled garden, As long as I've got you then I don't care!

        My 3DS Friend Code: 2208-5334-3531 (Ask for Pokémon shenanigans or random multiplayer games)
        My Switch Friend Code: SW-1503-3394-5328
        My NNID: OfficialTRXD
        Steam: http://steamcommunity.com/id/lunapixu/

        Comment


          #5
          Originally posted by TRXD View Post
          @Leon
          Thank you. While it's not necessarily the past that I fear or wish to escape, I do wish to rise above what has come before. Of course, my mind is a very fickle thing. It knows just the right things to bog me down or terrify me. And to me enough was enough.
          I know not how long this may take but I do know that I've already made a great effort today. Though the nightmare itself may not be gone, I'm certain the form it took will no longer be a problem.

          That said, I don't know what to really ask of people in this. I'll likely think of something but I'm not sure.
          I think that's something we all wish for. If you don't mind my asking, TR, would you happen to be an INFP?

          Comment


            #6
            @MC
            Kinda strange seeing a reply for this coming straight out of the blue. I'll let it slide though.

            Regardless, indeed I am an INFP.
            Here's my results from 16personalities.com:

            http://i.imgur.com/p453HGc.png
            Smash through the blocks that bar your way; No time for fear, just let it all fall away; Nobody believes in me and you, Just look at the way they stare; So what if we live in a walled garden, As long as I've got you then I don't care!

            My 3DS Friend Code: 2208-5334-3531 (Ask for Pokémon shenanigans or random multiplayer games)
            My Switch Friend Code: SW-1503-3394-5328
            My NNID: OfficialTRXD
            Steam: http://steamcommunity.com/id/lunapixu/

            Comment


              #7
              Yep, same as me. I had a feeling of that. Sorry if it sounded a bit too personal.

              The thing is that I have a lot of fears but none of which that could be considered... nightmarish, I guess? I have a fear of heights and germs but I'm guessing that wasn't the type of fears you were referring to.

              I guess the fear of the most... psychological (?) nature would be the fear of what happens next. Uncertainty about the future is one of those things that makes me uncomfortable and paranoid. But I guess there's really not much we can do about making the future more certain; after all, it's not like we can see what's going to happen before it actually does.

              This is what freaks me out - the thought of some news report coming up and telling me that we're about to be sucked into a black hole in 24 hours or something, kind of like that episode of Family Guy. I'm not exactly sure how I would react to that sort of occurence, but I doubt I would be feeling pleasant.

              Then there was when I developed a fear of going to sleep and not waking up. That took its toll on my sleep cycle and it's part of why it's so screwed up now.

              Sorry if I kind of dragged on. I wasn't entirely sure what was a good answer to your overall question.
              Last edited by MCSuire; 12-03-2016, 08:00 PM.

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