[OOC/Character Creation] - Fantasia

WriggleRid3r

WriggleRid3r

Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 7523

10/01/2015, 04:03 AM #31
You can edit it directly by clicking Edit Post.

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Kilelicus

Kilelicus

Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 481

10/01/2015, 04:07 AM #32
Don't misunderstand, Invalidum are capable of Magnus like acts, but...

Also, unless those dudes are Impotens, which there's a 1% chance of, they're gonna be calling Magnus "A Deus" or "Deis." Deis being the plural form.

Sometimes I feel like the only normal person here
"My Threshing has been Extra Princely Fresh"

Hazmer Baybee
Miniking1

Miniking1

Join Date: Sep 2015
Posts: 0

10/01/2015, 04:07 AM #33
I meant as in permission to edit it. I wasn't sure if we were allowed to edit IC posts or not.

It's always me doing the tedious things...
Dear Random Number God; Stay outta my way!
WriggleRid3r

WriggleRid3r

Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 7523

10/01/2015, 04:12 AM #34
Yeah you can. We edit our IC posts to fit the mold of the story all the time :3

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Kilelicus

Kilelicus

Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 481

10/01/2015, 04:18 AM #35
Well I mean, the only other option is deleting it and making a new one... which is effectively editing it.

If you're planning on doing something with this girl, make an app for her. If she's gonna be in the condition she's in, she's an Invalidum or an Impotens. The only other option is her being a Figment. We have three Magni already. They're supposed to be rare.

Sometimes I feel like the only normal person here
"My Threshing has been Extra Princely Fresh"

Hazmer Baybee
Miniking1

Miniking1

Join Date: Sep 2015
Posts: 0

10/01/2015, 05:21 AM #36
I'm interpreting them being Figments, the bears as well. Of course, the siblings don't know this, which is why their dialogue is as it is.

It's always me doing the tedious things...
Dear Random Number God; Stay outta my way!
Kilelicus

Kilelicus

Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 481

10/01/2015, 05:45 AM #37
Just off-handed advice, Mini. Every time you have someone else speak, skip TWO lines instead of one like you have now in that post. Also: Everything that's going on in your post is happening retroactively, as it's currently early morning in Fantasia, not that one could tell. You can timeskip to a correspondent time whenever you need to, but you can't interact with any of us until you do so.

Sometimes I feel like the only normal person here
"My Threshing has been Extra Princely Fresh"

Hazmer Baybee

Alayosho

Builder

Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 192

10/01/2015, 12:57 PM #38
Basic Grammer, with Alayosho!

Whenever a new person begins speaking, you separate them with a paragraph change. Even if Joe, the Yesman, only says "Yes Boss". Ex.:

----
Boss preforms action, then says, "I am monolouging!" There is more text here to describe things like how he said his monolouge, and maybe some actions preformed during speech,

"Yes Boss" Joe Said. (The full line. Joe is two dimensional, unimportant, and no one cares about him. Even with such a bland line, the paragraph has to change.)
-----

One way to make unimportant speech, without breaking the paragraph, is to place it with the speaker's line. Ex.:

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Boss makes an action, "Speaking!" pretty words here, and his Yesman, Joe, voiced his agreement (In this example, Joe is so amazingly unimportant that we cant even honor his lame ass with a dialogue change. his "yes" isn't even voiced, its just acknowledged that he said it in response to an actual character's actions.)
----

The later example should be used sparingly and is more of a time when everyone already knows what is going to be said, and could guess "Of course Joe said yes". While any actual character, like Bill From Acounting, speaking up, should get their own line. If you lump a handful of Character's that are important with a group of crappy ones, you can do something like "They said yes, even Bill From Accounting and Sally, the receptionist"

I gazed up at the sable-haired maiden with eyes so full of warmth it appeared she was crying silently. My trecherous mouth opened, "Why do you look so troubled, Princess?"

Slowly, she moved her eyes from the moon to me. She studied my imperfections before her for what seemed to be a blissful eternity before gracing me with her voice, "I've slain this land's only prince. What use, now, is a princess?"

As the maiden left my presence, so too did my heart.
Lunasa Prismriver

Lunasa Prismriver

Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 293

10/01/2015, 04:18 PM #39
@Alayosho

I really hope that you're being ironic here because I'm seeing incorrect grammar in your grammer lesson.

Alayosho

Builder

Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 192

10/01/2015, 04:21 PM #40
My grammer and spelling is sh**, but the lesson here is just separating the dialogue paragraphs, spiced with some creative liberty in writing.

I gazed up at the sable-haired maiden with eyes so full of warmth it appeared she was crying silently. My trecherous mouth opened, "Why do you look so troubled, Princess?"

Slowly, she moved her eyes from the moon to me. She studied my imperfections before her for what seemed to be a blissful eternity before gracing me with her voice, "I've slain this land's only prince. What use, now, is a princess?"

As the maiden left my presence, so too did my heart.